Bobby Flay...

...is a douche.

How you gonna let people think they are hosting a show where they showcase their BEST recipe, then crush their dreams by challenging them, cook the SAME dish the "B FLAY WAY", and quite possibly embarrass them in a showdown in front of ALL their homies?

I mean, dude is a decorated chef and he's gonna pick on little peons of the food game?

This guy has won Emmy's for his cooking show, EMMY'S, and he's gonna pick on cream cheese hot dog truck outside of the Shell station on the corner of Broadway and Pike?

I can picture it now...

Hey Carlos, that's a great hotdog you got there... but here's MY take on the hotdog!

What I've prepared for you all today is a chorizo sausage with roasted red peppers and onions on a modified ciabatta bun, all topped off with a chipotle aoili. All resting on bed of blue maize tortilla chips.

...the hell outta here son.

I'm surprised nobody on the show hasn't gave him a cold duff to the chin yet.

What a douche.

This is common at work...

No joke.

Do not go into the men's bathroom after lunch. It is straight down to business in there. Dudes enter, make a bee-line straight to the available stall, close the door, drop trow, and drop bombs -- no joke.

Refer to my previous post about the Art of Taking a Deuce at Work.

I'll admit it, I've hunkered down in the trenches and engaged in my own Call of Duty: Modern Warfare... and I've come out alive and is now a decorated veteran -- I'm Prestige level 10, ya'll just privates *pause*.

You've been educated! Take it easy ya'll!

Filipino Food for Thought

Filipino food.

Earlier today I was wondering, why hasn't Filipino food gone mainstream? I mean, people go out to sample the culinary arts from all over Asia -- Vietnamese (foo!!), Chinese, Japanese, shit.. even Indian -- but it seems like Filipino food got the short end of the stick.

I feel like nobody ever wants to go out and get Filipino food... except for Filipinos. Doesn't make sense because you or your moms, or your dad, or your tito, or your tita should be at least able to make ONE dish. Otherwise, you takin' that..


I think it's because Filipino food is weird.

Like how are you going to call a dish 'chocolate meat' when there's no damn chocolate in it? I ate this so much when I was little, solely on my mom's word that it was actually Hershey's and not Porky Pig's hemoglobin and T-Cells. It's okay though -- I ate everything. I was also fat.

Balut though? This be on that crazy tip -- once I turned ten and figured out what this was, I gave my mom the Heisman every time she offered. I mean, it's a chick fetus. C'mon now. Every time I describe this to one of my friends, they be like this...

Call me not a true Filipino, but I'ma chill with that stuff -- I'll leave it to Andrew Zimmern to do that. I'll still eat Filipino food regardless, but there are just somethings we make that are too weird for it to mainstream.

Arthur out!

One thing that sucks...

I'm a laid back. I'm easy going. I'm nice. If you met me, you would be captivated and engulfed within my positive aura. I think I might be talking bullshit, maybe. But there are some things that just straight up irritate me.

Farting right after you're done taking a shower. Sucks.

I mean you come back from a workout or a long day, you're just itching to take that hot shower. And maybe make boo boo, but that just might be me. But just having the scalding water wash all the worries away... it's a great feeling. You walk out, feelin' brand new, feelin' on top of the world, feelin' all grown and sexy.

Then *poot*. You fart.

I mean you waited all day for this, got clean and everything, then your body decides to be an asshole (lol) and tells you to pass flatulence? Just tainting your butt's air supply right when you walk out? Having that poison gas just linger on your epidermis right after you got done scrubbing it?

Man, that sucks.

The Power of Laughing Out Loud

Laughing Out Loud.

Other well known monikers include 'lol', 'LOL', 'LoL'. This is the most powerful internet abbreviation, hands down.

Why?

You can say anything to anybody on the internet and just tack this little expression on the end, and everything is taken lightly. And I mean ANYTHING. Crazy, perverted, dirty... ANYTHING.

Let's illustrate this. Say you're talking to this freeky zeeky girl and you trying to knock the boots without using the power...

You: I wanna give you a dirty sanchez and smash that filet mignon with the power of a tsunami.
xSeXXXi MaMi 69x: what the fuck?
xSeXXXi MaMi 69x has signed off.

Didn't work out so well. Let's now use the power of laughing out loud.

Arthur:I wanna give you a dirty sanchez and smash that filet mignon with the power of a tsunami lol
Jessica Alba: I'm moist, Arthur.

Boom. Easy peasy. LOL works. The reason? It has a light-hearted connotation connected with it -- it's as if you were smiling while talking to them in real life. So next time you're online and tryna halla and bring those relations to the next level, or if you're just wanna mess around... remember the power of LOL.

LOL!

Funny YouTube Comments Vol. 1

I watch insane amounts of videos on YouTube. I swear I've wasted/enjoyed a lot of my time on this website. Let's take a closer look...

This is my YouTube profile. Check the amount of videos I've watched. 11,264.

11-freaking-thousand.

Let's do some quick math: 11,264, let's say 4 minutes a video... that's 45056 minutes. There's 1440 minutes in one day, so thats 31.29 days spent watching videos on YouTube. Thats 8.57% of the year.

Cot damn! And yes I'm a nerd, suck it.

With that, I've seen some of the craziest comments on these videos. I swear, people on YouTube have no regard, no respect, no care in the world when leaving these comments. There's definitely some outlandish shit I've seen.

Also, there's some comments where I'm scratching my head (no homo, get it?) and wondering, "What's you're education like doggie?" I swear I feel like I'm trying to decipher an ancient language sometimes when I'm reading these comments -- like on some Egyptian hieroglyphics, Where in the World is Carmen San Diego, super sleuth, Hardy Boys type shit.

I would like to share with you, some examples.

Ludacris ft. Chris Brown & Sean Garrett - I know what them girls like [Lyrics]

tic4tic4 (2 days ago) Show Hide
0
Marked as spam
Reply | Spam
i love this song so much i would proboly finat if i really seeen him or i would kiss himm

'Finat' huh? I don't know what that means, but I think she wants to have sex with Chris Brown. Or just kiss him.

Usher - Trading Places

iManicMan (52 minutes ago) Show Hide
0
Marked as spam
Reply | Spam
dis song iz hot i no dis random bt he gt cute toes n sik trianers bet wifey pist at da song even do dey actin

iManicMan is commenting on Usher's toes. Better call 'no homo' dog. Unless you're actually gay, that's okay too -- I'm not going to be pist at you.

leejalloh1981 (1 hour ago) Show Hide
0
Marked as spam
Reply | Spam
lmfao wtf its shes on top and his at da bottom means dat shes grindin on him stupid learn ya shit be4 i say shit like u nava let a gurl come on top off u be4 to grind ya dick or u don't cuzz u nava had sex

Translation: "I am laughing, confounded by your ignorance -- the woman is pleasing herself on top of the man. Educate yourself before I have to teach you. You haven't had a female orgasm on top of you during coitus before? Maybe it's because you never have had intercourse."

YouTube User ekaiann's profile

loserandsohigh23 (4 days ago)
Spam
Marked as spam
has anyone ever touched your clit??

Not gonna lie, I laughed pretty hard at this. This guy went all in for real, but have some class man! Hahahaha

Alright alright, I gotta go -- time to be productive. Take it ez ya'll!

Four TV crushes that I had growing up...

Growing up, I watched a lot of TV. A LOT. Whether it was TGIF with Step-By-Step, Family Matters, Boy Meets World etc. or Nickelodeon with My Brother and Me, Are You Afraid of the Dark? Didn't matter, I watched it. I was going through adolescence at the time, so naturally I was a little... let's say, "enthusiastic"... when certain girls were on TV.

Okay, I was a horny little kid back then. Who wasn't?! Pfft.

Anyway, I had four distinct crushes growing up -- every time they graced the TV screen my heart would flutter...

Or I would get a stiffy. One of the two.

1. Salt-N-Pepa

Every every EVERY time I saw this video, I got a tingle in my loins. I swear. I couldn't put my finger on it (no pun intended, lol). They were just so suggestive, so suave, so explicit! I remember I would go over to my friend's house in the 1st grade and pretend we were making out with them (no homo). I also vividly remember my friend saying he would rip Pepa's shirt off and just relive his breast feeding days. I promise it was my friend. Promise. We were growing up alright!

2. Alex Mack

This show was the shit. It had great storyline, great plot, great cinematography. Syke. All it had was Alex Mack. It also had a young actress named Jessica Alba, but she's hella weak (lol). To tell you the truth though, I don't remember any episode except the first one -- you know, the one where she JUST got her powers and didn't know how to transform into that puddle without losing all her clothes? Yeah, that one.

3. Aunt Becky

Yes, this is Aunt Becky from Full House. The same Aunt Becky that got with Uncle Jesse and had those twins. Everybody was heads over heels over the Olsen twins. I ain't give a eff bout them -- I cared for Aunt Becky. I don't care if she's older, she definitely "fluttered" my 7 year old "heart" *cough*. I don't even know what kinda haircut she got in this picture, on that 'Something About Mary' status, but I sure as hell didn't care. She was definitely the best female on the show, with Kimi Gibbler coming in a close 2nd place (not really). She's all grown now and still looking good so halla at a playa, I'm a grown man ma.


4. Gwendolyn "Winnie" Cooper

Winnie Cooper. You know from the jump that she was the girl that would be with you to the end -- she was the girl down the street that would play outside with you all day, playing tag, football, spin the bottle (lol). Growing up I had no real kids on my street unless you counted some older girls that lived next to me. I didn't really hang out with them though. I had better things to do anyway, like play Super Mario Bros. 2.

But I digress, Winnie Cooper filled that gap. She definitely captivated the 7 year old Arthur. I was so pissed when Kevin messed that up. Cot damn.

So those were my TV crushes from when I was growing up. Writing this struck me with a strong sense of nostalgia. Ahhhhh...

On another note, I'd like to with my girlfriend a happy birthday..


<3 <3 HAPPY BIRTHDAY <3 <3

Take it ez ya'll!

I got two words for you...

If you know me personally, or if you're just been following the blog for a while, you know I'm a fan of a particular gesture -- a rather vulgar gesture at that. BUT, if you know me, you also know that I'm all jokes and it's all in good fun.

How do you do this gesture, you ask?

Basically you cross your arms and place them conveniently over your crotch-region. Sometimes forcefully. Sometimes gently.

What does this gesture mean, you ask?

Simply, it means that you request fellatio.

Or in other brash and crude words, to "suck it"!! I apologize if you find offense -- it's understandable. To be fair to me though, it's usually occurs when I'm not Arthur the Aardvark, but Arthur the Inebriated.

Let's get some examples in here:






Before you say, "Arthur, you dumb ass you're not doing it in this one!"...

...it's because I don't have to! I'm a bo$$

Can't forget this post.

I'm not the only fan of telling people to, you know, suck it. My younger brother showed me this video earlier today of a sponsored skateboarder. I'm a fan of Jamal Smith, but I have not seen this video before today. Regardless, I personally think he has great taste (no homo) and can almost dance better than me (almost).



Am I kewl yet?

hahahah later you guys ;]

Bears are the best animal. Period!

Hey, what is your favorite animal? Dog? Cat? Goat? Doesn't matter -- bears are better. Bears are... THE best animal. Period. If you don't agree...




Get outta here. LoL

Three reasons why bears are the best animal...

1. They are lazy as hell.

Bears are lazy as hell -- they sleep for freaking up to 7 months! This is 7 months without moving, exercising, or taking a shit. In order for them to do this, they lower their heart rate from 60-90 beats per minute to 8-40 beats per minute. Eight beats per minute. Really? That's 1 beat every 7.5 seconds. Yes I'm a nerd, don't worry about it. But seriously how can you do that? Just imagine not taking a doo doo for 7 months...



People call this hibernating. I call it being a bo$$.

2. They fish.

Fishermen are tight -- fishing is one of the things I like doing, even though I may not be that great at it :D Fishies fishies are a staple of a bears diet... and they catch them with their bear/bare (get it? am i kewl yet?) hands. I mean, if I can't catch much with a pole no homo... don't know if I'd have much luck with my bare hands. Think about it too, bears don't even have opposable thumbs! Shit's amazing. I am aroused.

3. They beat ass.

Bears are buff as fuk. Almost as buff as me.........(lol). But seriously, they possess extraordinary strength, regardless of size or animal. A bear can kill a moose, elk, deer, whatever the hell it wants, in one swipe of its front paw. What the hell.

But Arthur... what about lions, tigers, rhinos, and elephants...?



Bears are the best animal. Period. I asked my friends though, "What is your favorite animal?" I like dogs! I like puppies! I like foxes! I like hippos! I like black panthers!

Whatever!! All get dunzo'd by the bear. Halla @ bears.

Funny thing though -- I asked my pops what his favorite animal was... he replied "Goats, because I can eat it when I get bored of it"


Lol wow really??????? hahahahaha

So this is my 50th post...

I'm surprised at myself -- never thought that I would make it this far, never thought that I would have done what I've done, never thought I could be so bo$$y... lol am I kewl yet? Last thing like this I had, was back on Xanga... and reading back on that old stuff... lol yeah let's just keep it at that.

But anyway, shit.

I'ma keep on doing what I'm doing, just being myself, good ol' Arthur. People call me a whole bunch of things -- weird, odd, queer (no homo), dumb, smart, funny, sexy, cutie (lol). Whatever the case though, I don't give doo doo. I'm going to just be myself. If you're not who you are, who are you then?

Dr. Seuss put it nicely,

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."

So take that and run with it! Take it easy! Arthur out!

Random note: One of the last doo doos I made... was shaped like a question mark. LoL sorry I had to do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2 things that I was ALWAYS called while growing up..

My name is Arthur James. If you read this blog, if you know me, if you just met me, if you sweat me, if you wouldn't let me, you know my name. Arthur James is a pretty sophisticated name if you ask me. I'm not trying to be conceited or big-headed or anything.. It's true! How many Arthur James do you know? That's right. None. I'm a bo$$.

Yeah I just contradicted myself but I do I care? No. I don't give a fffuuuuuuuuuu...

Going through elementary with a name like Arthur James... you know my ass was about to get teased (no homo). Not like I cared though -- all I know is I beat all y'all asses in the Timed Math Tests, addition, subtraction, multiplication, AND division! Yes, I'm Asian so what?!

Anyway, two things that I've always always ALWAYS were called while growing up:

1. Arthur, the PBS cartoon



This was obvious. EVERY EVERY EVERY time I meet somebody new that's trying to get to know me, hit on me, be a jerk, whatever... 8 times out of 10 the conversation goes like this:

"OH LIKE THE CARTOON?!"

I respond, "YES, LIKE THE CARTOON, YES LIKE THE AARDVARK, YES LIKE A-A-R-D-V-A-R-K, YES YES YESSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!"

They are aroused.

Not that exaggerated, but you get the idea. But hey, I'm not mad. I don't mind at all. Little Arthur's got style, got game, got all that. He rocks sweaters with the collar, got Francine and Muffy on lock. Everybody loves him.. see look...

Arthur's st-stuntin' like a habit right here. And no, that's not my girlfriend, just a friend.

2. James Bond

With a middle name like James, it had to happen. Bond. James freakin' Bond biaaatch! I wasn't mad at all for this one though -- he gets gadgets, gear, and that gushy gushy. Look at this picture right here..

Look at that shit. James Bond's just chillin' with his PP7 pistol and these hoes are straight undressin'. Shiet, one of them is already topless, waiting for the bo$$ to come through and go 'under cover' (am I kewl yet?). Some girl on the top left is getting jealous and lettin' that nip slip. Trying to tempt the top agent... cover that shit up, b!

Sorry for the picture -- it's not safe for work. But hey, you shouldn't be looking at this stuff at work anyway so poo on you! Just clear the history and we'll be in the clear. Hahaha

Anyway, I've been called Arthur the Aardvark and James Bond all my life, but at the end of the day... I'm just Arthur James. Throw up the fist of power with me!

Corporate Life: The 2 worst times to take a deuce (lol get it?)

Going poo at work is a mixed bag -- you get to relieve yourself and feel great after, but...you're still taking a deucer at work/in public. This is amplified when you start working in corporate, where bathrooms are big, toilets are aplenty, and there's many people milling around... that will do their business inevitably some time of the day.

I'm going to help you out -- I'm going to tell you when are the best times to go number 2. It's simple: when nobody is around.

Since it's pretty much impossible to figure out when nobody is around, I find it much easier to just point out the WORST times to handle your business.

1. In the morning.

This is one of theeeee most horrible times to drop the kids at the pool. I swear. Do you know how many people drink coffee, ESPECIALLY corporate people who have to be at work early in the morning? Do you know what coffee does to you? Well I do -- it makes me want to take a big shit. Cot damn. This is why I don't drink coffee anymore (plus I'm using Crest White strips so I can't be messing that up, halla @ me).

If you have to go in the morning, might as well pinch your cheeks, exit left and wait awhile.


2. After lunch.

I've made my observations -- EVERY time I have to go after lunch I do one of these.

EVERY time, EVERY stall is taken. EVERY. EVERY. EVERY. Maybe it was taco salad day, or pork and beans day, or somebody spiked the coke machine with ex-lax.. I don't know. But yeah, don't waste your time. Well, you COULD get lucky. Probably not.

Well now I've passed on some wisdom. Hopefully your entrails emptying endeavors go well, and your bowel movements are now moving. Good luck!

And to people that are disgusted by this stuff: it's my blog! Plus its just poop. Everybody does it. Even hottie bombo latties (like me, no homo + halla @ me).

You so young, fly, and flashy!

Before I start, let me say that I don't really know much about high fashion. I'd like to think that I dress clean -- not too flashy, not too dressy, just my own regular style. I'd also like to think that I am fairly open to other people's fashion and style. BUT there are just some things that confuddle me beyond belief... anddd I'm going to take a break from being all congenial and shit and try to dissect some of these new (or old?) fashion statements, in the most heterosexual way of course (otherwise known as "no homo")

Also, if you happen to dress similar to these pictures.. no hard feelings. I don't care how you dress -- I'm just bored and irritated that I can't play my Xbox360 because my papa is watching The Filipino Channel. Damnit.

Anyway... ON TO THE PICTURES!~


Metrosexual just started getting popular over the past few years, but I think this guy is stepping the line right here. How you gonna wear a female denim + purse combo then mean mug the camera thinkin' you're really doin' it? With your Cyclops sunglasses word to the X-Man Scott Summers. Pants lookin' like one of those painted on joints they started doin' for the swimsuit edition of Sports Illustrated. I sure hope his girlfriend gave him the purse and was taking the picture because this guy is takin' straight L's. Cot damn! I would rock that Piston's jacket tho...


These dudes (maybe dudes? The one on the left is looking a little.. I don't know, could go either way)...Where was this picture taken tho? Never Never Land? Looking straight out of World of Warcraft with their whimsical look word to Night Elves. Also I think those types of scarves that their wearing has a religious meaning to them... but I guess they also make a great fashion statement?


How you gonna look like a male version of Catwoman word to Batman? This guy, having the audacity to strike a pose like this in public, especially in a high traffic area like a subway. How did that go down? "Alright, strike a pose!" "FIERCE!" ...with your America's Top Model ass. I feel weird looking at those shoes tho -- peek toe and open heel heels, what is that!? Seriously. Haircut lookin' like a bootleg Bobby Brown + Sisqo.


No comment. Hahahahah


What a bo$$.

Hahahahahah well I had my fun. Again, I'm just crackin' some jokes... don't be maaaaad.

Happy 4th of July, be safe!

My, My, My, I love Pie!

Pie is the best dessert. No discussion. On my next birthday I don't want a effin cake -- I just want a big ass pie that I can walk into and eat like that Gingerbread house Hansel and Gretel had back in elementary school. On my wedding day I don't want a wedding cake, I just want a mountain of McDonald apple pies. They are 2 for 1$ anyway...

That picture is straight boner inducing, cot damn (no homo). Look at those apple slices -- so crisp and firm yet melts in your mouth, a smattering of cinnamon and apples caressing the taste buds, rejuvenating (hahaha).But seriously pie is the best, here are some reasons:

1. It looks good.
2. It smells good.
3. It tastes good.
4. There are different flavors, like apple, pumpkin, cherry, poontang (lol).
5. Best reason, if you are tired of it, you can just put your ding dong king kong in it like in American Pie!!!!
   
6. I like it... doesn't matter about anybody else!!
7. I'm so kewl...................................
   

So pretty much pie is like Arthur....... am I kewl yet??? You might be saying "Arthur, what about cake? Cake is way better than pie! You're still sexy tho..." Here's what I have to say...


I swear I don't know what the big appeal with cake is -- cake sucks! It's all dry and shit, not even moist or juicy, I mean seriously. "But what about the icing and frosting?" No, that stuff sucks too! Only cake that's good is ice cream cake and thats not even cake -- it's just ice cream. I'll slap anybody that likes cake.

Wondering what everybody else has to say... I went and asked random people off my buddy list. The results are in.. anddddd I have alot of slapping to do hahahah. Click on the picture to enlarge/read it way better.


Oh well, I guess it's just me and pie alone together. Unless some people out there like pie also... vote on the survey on the right and let me know!

Time to do something more productive.. like make some pop-tarts, macaroni and cheese or somethin, eat some more pie, ionno.

Take it ez y'all.

I just wanted to say...

I write this stuff for fun. I write it because I enjoy thinking and doing random ass things. This is just pure Arthur right here, no joke.

But enough of me, I just wanted to make this post for the readers -- all 2 of you. Hahaha, I'm kidding.. but seriously I get compliments from the readers and to tell you the truth, it make me smile so so so big.. both inside and outside. Like I don't care how people view me, I'ma do me.. you can count on that. It's just that having people tell you that they enjoy what you're doing... it's very heartwarming to me.

Maybe the blog will turn into a website, then to something else.. who knows. But I just wanted to say 'thank you!' I not only write my blog for myself, but also for everybody else.

Thank you ;]

AND if you don't like my blog....

hahaha arthur signin out.. take it ez y'all!!

Survey says I'm a Bo$$!

Every time I log onto MySpace, 9 out of 10 bulletins are surveys. I don't get why people (girls) like them so much. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining -- I find these surveys funny. MySpace surveys to me, is a subtle way for people (girls) to express things to people (boys) that they wouldn't normally say. Kinda like a sneaky way to say "hey i wana tell you sumthin.............." Maybe it's fact, maybe it's fiction. Nonetheless I find them good for a chuckle! haha

Some questions that stuck out at me as perfect examples:

(050) Have you ever been criticized about your sexual performance?

This is funny because you know damn well no person (girl) is going to admit it and say "Yes I suck in bed, please teach me how to be the next Tera Patrick." Instead, they will take this as a perfect opportunity to show 'what's really good' BUT... in a subtle way. Maybe something along the lines of ... "Well, I haven't been with ALOT of guys.. but I haven't gotten any complaints..... ;)" What this answer shows CLEARLY to me, is that she gets smashed on the regular AKA she's ready AKA she's down AKA halla @ her.

Have you ever had a one night stand?

Hahah, this one gets straight to the point. Most girls would never admit to this. They think it will label them as .. how can I say.. a woman who engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse. Or a ho. But it's whatever to me, do what you wanna do, I ain't mad! Anyway, this is why this question has a low 'yes' rate. When the survey taker says yes though...


Cot damn surveys are funny! Now, you may be asking: "If you think surveys are so funny Arthur, why don't you take one yourself?!" Alright then, I will do that. I have gone to a site appropriately named myspacebulletins.com (who would have thought?), and took time to answer the most popular survey... its been taken 36129 times (shit!). Here we go...

75 Questions You've Probably Never Been Asked

1. First thing you wash in the shower? My ding ding dong dong king kong
2. What color is your favorite hoodie? Grey (boring, i know, fu)
3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? No cuz im a playaaaa (not rly)
4.Do you plan outfits? My butt is itchy in the middle
5. How are you feeling RIGHT now? bad, real bad, bad to the bone
6. Whats the closest thing to you thats red? my swagger deoderant (see: http://arthurjay.blogspot.com/2008/04/my-swag-is-at-all-time-high.html)
7. Do you say aim or a-i-m? I say g-a-y (no homo)
8. Tell me about the last dream you remember having? I think it was a wet dream
9. Did you meet anybody new today? yes i like to meet new people cuz im a bo$$
10. What are you craving right now? i wonder if i have any hw
11. Do you floss? cuz im so fRE5H!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (not rly)
12. What comes to mind when I say cabbage? a dog standing on its two hind legs wearing an eye patch and a hook. eating an egg.
13. When was the last time you talked on aim? g-a-y (no homo)
14. Are you emotional? slap yo dum azz
15. Would you dance to the taco song? wth is a taco song. i like tacos tho. hallaaaa
16. Have you ever counted to 1,000? i dun kno how 2 du da mathz, plz tiech me
17. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it? i put it into a cup, watch it melt in the sun, then drink it
18. Do you like your hair? yes cuz its SO WAVYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
19. Do you like yourself? I'm a bo$$
20. Have you ever met a celebrity? I met myself once............
21. Do you like cottage cheese? yeah i like it, esp with pineapples
22. What are you listening to right now? ur mom tryin to halla @ me.........
23. How many countries have you visited? 829174191827486939393
24. Are your parents strict? beat yo ass
25. Would you go sky diving? i wish i had some orange juice
26. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush? lol
27. Would you throw potatoes at him? this survey is dum
28. Is there anything sparkly in the room you’re in? yeah my eyez......... (no homo)
29. Have you ever been in a castle? my house.. cuz im KING ARTHUR!!!! am i kewl yet
30. Do you rent movies often? only the adult ones (yaiz)
31. Who sits in behind you in your math class? i sit in the back row

Man there's 75 questions to the survey, but eff this! I can't see how people.. 36129 different people.. took the time out of their lives to answer this survey. Oh well, they are still funny to me haha. I'm going to go study, draw, play video games.. something.

Take it ez y'all... bub bye!!!!!!!!!!!!

How to Get Poppin' on Valentine's Day

Wsup y'all. It's 2:11 AM and I just got home from working on code for 7 hours straight (halla @ me) but I don't give an eff...today is a special day -- it's Valentine's Day cheeeuhhhh



I know some people don't like this holiday because of whatever whatever.. but cheer up because Arthur's on the loveline and I'ma gonna help you out b. This is how you can get it poppin' on Valentine's Day aka sexyyyytimeeeeee aka have her talk in falsetto ooh ooh baby ahhh aaahh eeeee aka Arthur is sexy.

First, you gotta start it off with old school.. bring it back to those elementary school days. Bust this out...

This will get things started for real, show her or him that you ain't playin'. Trust me I got hella hoes from this right here (not really but whatever).

Then you gotta show that you're sensitive, that you're so kew men, that you're the one with that gushy gushy hottie bombo lattie. This will do it...

They won't be able to resist by now... you gotta set the mood with some music. None of that Chris Brown, Bobby Valentino, Jodeci, Barry White stuff. Put this on...

Give her something to show what's on your mind. Give her something from the heart.

Halla @ it.

That's all you gotta do, and you good.



Happy Valentine's everybody... wrap it up b hahah

Computer Love

I could talk about my first day of class or what I did today, but I'm an Electrical Engineer -- it's already well known the insane amounts of booty we get. So I'm going to pass on that.

Instead I'm going to talk a little about Computer Love aka AIM conversations aka E-Game. More specifically laughter. Laughter is a great indicator to assess if the person you're trying to get at is really into you. There's many different levels to this.

Let's take a look at 'lol'.

This means they aren't into you.

lol.

Let's use an example:

FrAtBoY4LyFE: There was this one time... blah blah blah drunk blah blah blah with my boys blah blah blah it was pretty much the best thing ever blah blah blah i got so drunk holy shit blah blah blah throw up blah blah blah.
xXTastYDiamonD69Xx:lol

You're done son.


This same thing goes for other low-tier representations of laughing such as "haha" or "hehe". There are some exceptions to this, like 'LOL' is the real deal (I know this from my gf, straight LOLs 100% of the time baby, I'm on point, which also goes on to show I'm a boss). But for the most part, you're not gettin' bunz my dude (she's not interested).


On the complete other side of the spectrum though, we have the additional "h" or "a" to "haha". This is money right here -- if you got a female or male (for the female readers, nohomo for me tho) and she's just straight hahah'ing it or hahaha'ing it, you're good. She's into you. Basically the more 'h' and 'a's you get, the more she likes you. It's a proven fact. (not really, but whatever)

Let's look at an example:

ArthurIsABoss: I went to school today.
YoMoms: hahaha
ArthurIsABoss: I ate a sandwich.
YoMoms: hahahaha
ArthurIsABoss: I'm going to scratch my booty, smell it with one hand, then scratch my balls and smell it with the other at the same time.
YoMoms: hahahaahahahahahahahah wanna come over?

But anyway, this was just something I've noticed and thought about a while back, and a random AIM conversation with my friend brought this up. Now I'm going to cook myself some dinner, nestle by the fire, and read my textbooks.