I was at this Thai food place getting my food, when I saw one of the workers was the mom of one of my friends from elementary school (wtf?). She's like "Hey Arthur I'm a bus driver also, just get into my bus and I can take the food to you and take you home." I'm like "ok".
...I'm a dumbass.
So I'm sitting on the bus and my friend's mom comes on with the food and starts driving the bus around. We driving and driving and finally she says "WE'RE HERE". By this point I'm like eff it I just want to get off this bus. So I step out the bus and she speeds off..
It's not my house. wtf.
So I'm stranded in the middle of nowhere in front of this yellow ass house and I don't know what to do. What would a boss do?
I went inside. hahah
Nobody was home. I went around, ended up in the kitchen and ended up taking 2 caramel and toffee cookies (the dream was vivid i told you) and started dancing because I was so happy. Like this
I left and just started running and running, I looked at the road names, and it was not even close to around my house. Time passes and nightfalls....
By this time I'm getting desperate -- hopping fences and all that. Then Clint Eastwood or some old actor pops up and he's like, "Hey come inside, I can help you". I'm like "ok".
Again I'm a dumbass.
So we talk and shiz and yeah his eyes messed up for some reason. His son and wife come in and what do you know, the wife is the fkn bus driver from before. I was going to be like "bitch where's my phad se ew" and beat some serious ass right then and there I swear, but then I found out that they are actually pretty effed up people -- they torture people until they are on the very brink of death then actually make dolls out of their body parts.
They made dolls out of people that were still alive. Clint Eastwood wow.
I jumped through the window and landed right on top of the fences and started running on top of them like a ninja (I'm a boss) they started chasing me but I'm too fast too furious.
I ended up in this backyard, anddddd some dogs tried to attack me. I kicked the first one square in the face I swear that dog got that sweet chin music. The 2nd dog was just this big ass blue dog and just stood there. I freaking slapped him like 3 times HELLA HARD, and it just stood there. So I fought the 3rd dog, I basically beat its ass like this
I jump the fence into the next yard.
Next yard was like a 2 story house but it was like cut in half -- like you could see the people in it and everything. But yeah there were two lines of people on the 2nd floor wearin freaking basketball practice jerseys or something and they were just falling down face first on the concrete then getting up and doing it again. Somebody said something about "falling training".
Weirdos.
So I'm running and daylight comes -- I find myself in a parking garage and these 3 asian kids were walking and I'm like "yo let me use your phone". Off course since I'm so sexy (no homo) he obliges.
But for some reason I could not dial my home phone for the life of me. You know how you have that memory in your fingers where you don't even have to look at the buttons but you still dial the right number. I kept on doing that and I kept fucking up. The reason why is because his numbers were all in different places.
This dreams weird.
So that's when I woke up to my cell phone.
Damn.
Now I'm just chiewing (chilling)
this is by far the best blog. ever. hahaha.
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