Saturday, May 1, 2010

Safeway at Night

Last night I went with my girlfriend to Safeway at around 11:30.

Weirdest checkout experience ever.

It wasn't the actual checkout that was weird, it was the people in the line and what they were buying. I remember each person vividly.
  •  Group of two girls who would get Pedobear's Stamp of Approval. They were buying like 10 packs of the same type of gum, I swear. Brushing your teeth in 2010 is out, cavities are in biatch! It was funny watching the clerk scan the same pack of gum like 92038 times.
  • The guy after them was buying two gallons of milk, both with different percentages of fat. At 11:30 at night. Maybe he wanted to compare fat densities of both. Maybe he ran outta milk for his Golden Grahams. Maybe he's a weirdo. I don't know. 
  • Next was this really quiet asian dude that was buying 1.99 dollar cinnamon buns. That's it. Did dude just wake up in the middle of the night and was "Damn I want creamy white stuff in my mouth?" *pause* then went and drove to Safeway? I ain't mad -- he gettin' in those buns.
  • Dude behind us bought like a footlong sandwich and floss. His homie was buying two 24-packs of beer -- one was Pabst and one was Rolling Rock. Flossing teeth party?
  • Next was two dudes again, but one was wearing black leather pants -- swag on super high. Doesn't mean that I won't SMH at him though. They were having a deep discussion in line, while buying beer also. I don't wanna know what that night led to.
You may be saying, "Arthur, you're so mean! What did you buy, you asshole!?" Contact solution and a toothbrush, you know, regular stuff.. so sit on it! Plus IDGAF.

Safeway at night, that's wsup.


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