Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Random Thoughts: Squeezits, Caprisuns, Fruitcups, etc.

Ya'll remember these food items when you were young?

Get all excited to get your grubby little mitts on em right after you've been playing at recess or smacking kids at kickball or grabbing your balls or some shit, go to open it all fast, and BOOM all of it squirts everywhere?

That's some bullshit.

You know the makers of Squeezits were sitting in the Squeezit factory, chillin' by the Squeezit spout with an empty bottle like, 'Yeah I'ma fk up a kids white tee some day.. But I don't give a shit!!' Then goes and fills that bottle right up to the top.

Man screw you!!

Same goes for Caprisuns. You wanna go and put the straw in the hole *pause* without covering the end with your thumb? Your face getting squirted on word to Peter North vs. Nautica Thorn. *pause* Got Mountain Cooler all up in your nostrils and shit.

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